SECRETS OF A SOCIAL WORKER

Find peace.Find happiness.Find yourself

Tag: self care (Page 3 of 3)

It’s A Good Week To Have A Good Week

September 12, 2016 / / 0 Comments

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Self worth and positivity, baby, that’s where it’s at! Today’s post is all about these lovely things and how easy peezy it is to incorporate some self lovin’ and  positive vibes into your every day routines. What a great way to start out the week!

  • Take vacations, take long vacations. None of this one-day-off junk! We all need extended time off to truly unwind and relax. Whenever I am on vacation, I find that it takes a few days for me to exhale and not think about the busy happenings of my everyday life. It is during these long breaks that we learn about ourselves, our hobbies, our minds, and what helps us to relax.
    The person that you spend the most time with in your life is yourself, you better try to make yourself as interesting a possible. What do you love about yourself, outside of work? Taking time to explore yourself will help you find what makes you tick. It helps you find your self worth, and it takes more than a day of vacation to do so.
  • Live a ‘want to’ life. Do not go through life with the feeling of having to do everything. What do you want to do? How can you live a ‘want to’ life? Find a life worth living and never forget to do the things you enjoy. Our careers do not define us as people, and there are deeper levels and meanings to who we are. Find who you are. Find your self worth; what makes you feel valuable and unique to society? What areas of your life need to change in order to be the chooser of your own path? What makes you feel happy and fulfilled outside of work; what excites you? 
  • Stop to smell the roses. Mindfulness, mindfulness, mindfulness…And in case you forget, here is one more mindfulness! The majority of my blogs have some aspects of being self-aware and appreciative of your surroundings. Be in the ‘now’ of your life, and if you cannot do so, then find someone or some thing that can help you achieve this.
    “Stop to smell the roses” can be your reminder to live in the moment and enjoy your surroundings. What are you appreciative of and happy about right now? Be grateful for what you have every single day…even on your worst days.
    Make a note to think about your roses every day. Are your roses good health, great family, and having a roof over your head…? Along with those marvelous things, I want you to dig even deeper. What are some great things you experience or have day to day that you overlook? To help you through the process, check out my Happy Things Thursday blogs!
    Personally, I like to think about my roses each day before bed because it helps me to go to sleep on a positive note, and wake up feeling the same way.
  • It’s not about perfection, it’s about effort. That is how change and transformation happen. Give it your best shot, and at the end of the day that is all you can do. We aren’t perfect, and the more we strive to be, the more stressful and unhappy our lives become. Know that you have done your best, even if you’re the only one who notices that day. Focus on your efforts and strengths each day, as that is where the true beauty in who you are lies…This is how we create self worth. We cannot love ourselves if we don’t feel worth, and without self worth we cannot love ourselves. Be proud of your accomplishments and give yourself credit when it’s due.
    Combined with the daily roses you’re going to acknowledge, try ending each day by recognizing your efforts and what you’re proud of…Go you! 
  • Feel sexy. This goes for  you too, men! It feels good to feel good! Do what makes you feel sexy- whatever that may be. We all gain confidence from feeling good. Love yourself and love your body. Be nice to yourself and use words of kindness-always. We all deserve a little sexy self talk, and sometimes we can just feel sexy for ourselves and not for anyone else.
    It is possible to retrain our brains to focus more on our positive traits…to focus more on what we love about ourselves, no matter how much we have put ourselves down. Try to tell yourself each day why you feel good about YOU, which in turn helps you gain that self worth. Keep an ongoing  list on your phone of what makes you so darn sexy, and keep adding to it. Then on those tougher days where you’re just not feelin’ it, you can pull out that list as a positive reminder.
    To feel sexy helps us to feel confident and proud of who we are…Flaunt it!
  • Buy stuff and don’t feel guilty. We all deserve a little retail therapy once and a while, do we not? It is okay to treat ourselves to the occasional coffee, beer, new shoes, hunting equipment, house decor, etc. It is not going to break the bank to reward ourselves a little bit now and again. It feels good. And hey, we all work hard! All of our money cannot be designated for bills and ‘adulting’. We all deserve some ‘fun money’ now and again, don’t we?! Nothing feels better sometimes than a little materialistic lovin’.
  • And finally…..It’s a good week to have a good week. Every second, minute, hour, day, week, year, and life is up to us. How awesome is that? It is our choice to look at each week with excitement and opportunity in our eyes and in our hearts. It is up to us to find the good in each experience we encounter. Choose to have a positive mindset…Choose to be kind to yourself, and do not forget to have a good week! 

There are two rules to success….
     1. Don’t forget to be awesome
     2. Follow rule #1

-keep shining

HALT

December 15, 2015 / / 0 Comments

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HALT
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired

The first time I heard about HALT was working with individuals who struggle with addiction. HALT is used a lot in relapse prevention programs, however I think it can be utilized daily by anyone who finds it beneficial. I use HALT a lot to ensure that I am taking care of myself and queuing into what my body is telling me that it needs. Simply asking yourself each day to assess your body for HALT symptoms (‘Am I hungry, angry, lonely, tired?’) will help you be more aware of what you need, and aware of how you’re interacting with the outside world. Paying attention to these simple needs is quick and easy, and will ensure that we are aware of our own well-being.

Hungry: Sounds pretty self-explanatory, right? But, how many of you skip meals or forget to eat when life gets busy? It happens more than we realize! We all know the importance of a healthy, balanced diet and how this truly is fuel for our brains. I know when I have skipped a meal or eaten late, I can feel myself get tired, impatient, and unfocused. There is no way to function every day feeling like that! For anyone to complete their daily tasks successfully they need to refuel their brains and bodies. People aren’t lying when they say breakfast is the most important meal. Even if you are not hungry in the mornings, try to get something in your body to fuel up your brain and body for the long day ahead. It is also so important to eat full meals throughout the day. We all get busy and have to settle for a granola bar now and again, but when you have time to plan ahead, try to prepare nutritious meals. There are many tips and tricks on the internet to take shortcuts and make meal preparation a breeze!

Angry: People associate anger as such a negative thing. Anger is just a feeling, it does not need to be anything more than that. It is okay to feel the way you feel. I wrote a blog about this a while back to remind you all that you are entitled to your own feelings! ( http://swsecrets.net/?p=43 ) Why are you angry? Just recognizing your anger can make a huge difference in the way you feel the rest of the day. Identify your anger. Have you ever tried ignoring your anger and then lashing out at someone later on in the day? We are all guilty of that, I bet! Taking time to recognize our anger and using steps to calm ourselves will keep us from lashing out at others. Plus, once we are aware of our anger it is less damaging to our mood. Awareness is everything.

Lonely: Everyone knows what it feels like to be lonely at some point in life. However, there is a difference between being lonely and being alone. If you feel lonely, there are always ways to make more connections with people. Whether that is online, community activities, scheduling more time to spend with friends…There are endless opportunities, and this is a great way to practice that self care I know you’ve been working on 😉 ( http://swsecrets.net/?p=174 ) Take a leap of faith and put yourself out there! Make a small effort each day to do one thing that helps you to feel connected to someone else. Just be sure to spend time with people who you feel comfortable with. Spending time with people that are not good influences in your life, or someone you’re not comfortable around, will not fulfill your feelings of loneliness. Make these interactions meaningful and fulfilling.
I personally struggle with being alone. I could be surrounded by people all the time and would rarely feel the need to have any alone time. This is something I am working on  changing about myself because silence is a beautiful thing. We are constantly surrounding ourselves with noise, but just being in silence can be so peaceful. I do not listen to music on the way home from work anymore, and it feels so good! Silence is golden.

Tired: Being tired takes a serious toll on our bodies. How often do we feel ‘tired’ and practically chug 8 cups of coffee before noon? It’s easy to ignore how tired we are when each day is filled with meetings, errands, other activities…Our ability to think accurately diminishes when we are constantly running on fumes. And if you add hunger, loneliness, and anger in the mix…Look out! Increasing the amount of sleep you get each night or finding a few moments in the day to close your eyes may be all you need to have a better outlook on life each day. Satisfying your need for rest is what keeps us healthy- both physically and emotionally. Simply recharging your mind/brain can be helpful- using self care techniques such as listening to music or deep breathing may be all you need to get through the day, and recharge your batteries!

HALT is a quick reminder to be sure we are meeting our basic needs each and every day. Am I hungry, angry, lonely, or tired? Taking a simple assessment of our needs will help us to practice being more in-tune with our bodies. Just take one minute per day to HALT, think about yourself, and how to manage the remainder of your day. You owe it to yourself to be happy and healthy.

It is health that is real wealth, not pieces of gold and silver.

-keep shining

Being Selfish Is Not Selfish

December 8, 2015 / / 0 Comments

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I know that you have heard me say it before, but I want you to know some really good news!!! Are you ready for it? Here it goes….

 It is okay to be selfish sometimes.

Isn’t that relieving?! Knowing that you can focus on yourself and your own needs, and not have to feel guilty about it?

For the sake of this blog I like to refer to selfishness as ‘self-interest’ because it has a much more positive tone to it. So, why is it so important to be self-interested? And how can we be self-interested without feeling guilty?

Answer me this…How productive are you when you are exhausted, upset, rushed? How involved and focused are you on your work, family, and other obligations when you are experiencing those symptoms I just listed? How are you able to fully invest in those obligations when you are not fully invested in yourself, first and foremost?

Do this exercise for me real quick: Come up with a list of things you can do for self care, because to be self-interested means you have to take care of yourself. What are some goals you can set for yourself to be sure you’re giving yourself enough ‘me time’, and how will you hold yourself accountable for reaching that goal? For example, one of my self care goals is to get a manicure every 3 weeks 🙂 I schedule my next appointment while I am at the salon so I know for sure that I will continue my self care and not forget about it. Although this act of self-interest costs money, there are many self-interest options that do not cost anything, such as taking a bath, going for a walk, calling someone you’re close to, listening to music, etc.

Each day ask yourself two things: 1. What would be the most loving action I could take for myself today? 2. What would be fun for me today?
Put these questions in your phone as an alarm, or write yourself a sticky note and place it somewhere you will see it each and every day.

Self-interest helps to clear our minds and feel rejuvenated. It helps me focus on myself, and what I need to do for me in order to focus on my other obligations. We need that ‘breath of fresh air’ sometimes, that break, that moment of selfishness to feel ready to take on the next challenge that comes our way. I know for a fact that I am much more empathetic, patient, and happy helping others at work every day when I also remember to help myself.

Sometimes I feel guilty when I focus on myself, and I think that is pretty normal. But, by reminding myself that I am a better me when I am happy and give myself some time to breathe, I feel so much better about every other aspect in my life. You are helping others more-so by spending some time focusing on you as well. With a fresh mind, you can better help and be there for others. It is all about balance and giving yourself permission to love yourself.

I think society puts a lot of pressure on us to do for others, be helpful, focus on people’s needs and how we can better this world. Yes, all of these things are true and important, but we are forgetting to include ourselves in there! We cannot better the lives of others if we are not bettering ourselves. We are a society focused on external reward and praise for our actions. Those are great things, but they can be even greater if we remember to give ourselves a break sometimes.
Self interest = self respect.
Type ‘self-interest quotes’ into your search engine and view images to see all the negative ideas of self-interest that pop up. This is unfortunately a good example of why we are made to believe that being self-interested is frowned upon, and that is truly a misconception!

It is not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and make your happiness a priority.  It’s necessary.

Have I persuaded you yet?

-keep shining

 

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