SECRETS OF A SOCIAL WORKER

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Tag: healthy life

7 Rules To Live By

April 25, 2017 / / 0 Comments

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1. There is more than 1 right way for things to work out.
We often put a lot of stress on ourselves for things to work out the way we want them to; the way we have planned it all out in our heads. However, this completely defeats the purpose of growth and learning. Life would not be nearly as exciting if things worked out as we plan and foresee them to. A little chaos and uncertainly is healthy, and it keeps us on our toes. Enjoy life’s ups and downs, and accept when things turn out differently than we wanted or planned.
There is a reason you’re ending up right where you are, going through what you’re going through, and experiencing something unforeseen or maybe even unasked for…Enjoy the journey.

2. We all experience pain differently, but that doesn’t mean you deserve it.
Pain is just a part of life. We are all going to go through many painful experiences, and often times unexpectedly. A lot of our pain comes from life not meeting the expectations that we set for ourselves.
Do not get discouraged. You do not go through pain because you have done anything to deserve it. We are supposed to experience pain as it makes us who we are.
Many of my most painful life experiences have ended up being the best teaching moments, and I have grown tremendously from them. Enduring pain is what makes us resilient!

3. Accept your biases.
No matter how hard we try, we are going to have biases and judgements regarding certain things in our lives. Humans are predisposed to what feels/looks familiar and safe. It is our awareness of our biases and how we act on them that matters. Not one person in this world has a perfect view of reality as we all see it through our own windows. Accepting your biases puts you in a position to expand your perspective and learn new things, recognizing that we can learn from others’ biases too. The key here is to be willing to hear others’ perspectives, admit when you’re wrong, and being open to changing your mindset.

4. We are meant to experience things that do not make sense to us.
We are all dealing with experiences and circumstances that are difficult, confusing, and unexpected. It is normal, and it is okay.  What is important to remember is that we try not to judge others as we have no idea their circumstances or their perspective of the situation; everyone deals with life the best way they know how. Confusion and uncertainty is going to happen; we aren’t supposed to have all the answers. We can’t control circumstances, but we can control how we react to them. Sh*t happens, whether we feel there is a reason for it or not.

5. Quit caring about what others think about you.
I’ve blogged about it before and I will blog about it again…What people think about you is none of your business. Why waste your time and energy caring about that? People are going to judge regardless. People are going to view you the way they want to, no matter how unflattering that may be.
Live your life the way you want to. The minute you stop trying to please others and focus on your own wants and needs, the more relieved you will feel. You choose the way you see yourself, bottom line.

6. Life is about change, stop being scared of it.
What fun would life be if we didn’t experience all the unplanned curve balls? Quit hesitating, quit thinking of what people will think, and quit overanalyzing the end result. Live in the moment, live in what feels right right now. Change is scary, especially when we weren’t asking for it, but think about where you’d be today if you didn’t endure some unexpected changes in your world. This is what makes life worth living! Enjoy the adrenaline that change brings out in you.

7. Never forget to tell people how you feel about them.
I think we can all agree that one of the best feelings in the world is when someone you care about tells you how they feel about you. Whether on a personal or professional level, never underestimate the power of this! There is no better way to brighten someone’s day then to tell them all the positive things you think about them. It makes people happy to be reminded of your feelings towards them, or when you compliment them unexpectedly.
Why keep those thoughts bottled up anyways? Brightening someone’s day feels good! 

 

You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself ~

-keep shining

A Letter To My Self Esteem….

December 27, 2016 / / 0 Comments

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I am going to pick your brains today and ask you to read this statement, and think about whether or not you agree –In a world that profits from our self doubt, loving ourselves is a defiant act.  Once you decide if you agree, think about how unfortunately true this is for us as society, both males and females.

All the diets, all the fads, the workout routines, the health shakes…. We have grown this industry so magnificently because of our continuous self doubt, self hate, and self consciousness. Of course, these businesses have also saved people’s lives, pushed people to healthier lives, and helped them lose unhealthy weight. But how powerful it must be for the health/wellness industry to know that as long as our body image continues to suffer, they are in business. As long as social media pushes perfection as reality, our self-esteem suffers and we continue to doubt ourselves.

You see, under the ‘chub rub’ between my thighs, beneath my tummy fat that jiggles when I run, and aside from the little fat roll that is created by my bra strap, is a very healthy woman. A woman who loves healthy proteins, who loves fruits and vegetables, and loves working out. A woman who does enjoy a beer from time to time, fast food, and sugary treats, but cannot enjoy these things without a little guilt sneaking in reminding me that when I eat this I will not be perfect. Underneath what you see on the surface is a woman who works hard and plays hard, and is grateful for her life.  But through her constant self doubt, she forgets about this other healthy and happy side that does not need the world to reassure or judge her based on how she looks.

But how can we feel good about ourselves when we are constantly reminded of how we are supposed to look through social media and what is considered beautiful in society? That constant reminder that to be beautiful means we need to be unrealistically perfect. This makes me sad not only for myself, but for all men and women striving for this unrealistic view of beautiful. There is nothing beautiful about being perfect. Perfect is boring, and it’s impossible.

When I research and find that being 145 pounds at 26 years old is almost considered overweight, I get discouraged.  I know how healthy,  muscular, and curvy I am, but some days that is not enough. How can that be, though, that I’m 145 pounds and almost considered overweight, for someone who spends 5 days a week doing vigorous workouts and enjoys my protein shakes and spinach? Through the constant reminders of what beautiful is supposed to look like, I forget about the beauty of who I am sometimes…. a lot of the times. And I bet many of you have had these same thoughts and questions.

I want you all to remember:

  1. Understand that what social media portrays is typically unrealistic. It is airbrushed, it is fake, and it is too perfect. We all know this, so we can all push back on this need to be perfect! Our significant others all know this too and do not expect perfection from us. A positive partner will want us to feel good about ourselves and be healthy.
  2. Quit reading the magazines, the fad diets, and trying to look like perfection. This is stressful and reassures our inability to be as perfect as society tells us to be. Do not strive to look like a celebrity, strive to look like YOU!
  3. Do what makes you happy, and ask yourself if you are living a realistic lifestyle. Can you maintain your diet and exercise? It is healthy, and do you feel good about it? It’s okay to enjoy some carbs, candy, and beer sometimes, we all deserve a break.
  4. Feel sexy. What can you do that makes you feel like the sexy little sex kitten that you are?! Is it wearing lingerie, even if you’re the only one who sees it? Is it working out? Do this whenever possible, and tell yourself how beautiful/handsome you are!
  5. There is nothing sexier than someone who is confident in the bedroom, and looks do not need to dictate your attitude in the bedroom.
  6. Focus on your accomplishments. Remind yourself every day of what your accomplishments are, and what you’re internally proud of.
  7. Spend time with supportive people…. This is huge! Having supportive, loving, and healthy people in your life will provide a more positive outlook on life.
  8. You have to put the work in. If you do want change, and you do want to be healthier, it takes some work. You must be willing to change parts of your lifestyle, and you must be patient through the process. It is hard! Physically, mentally, and emotionally hard.
  9. What is love? Is it looks, is it materialistic things? Of course not! You did not come to love your friends and significant other because of how they look, it is because of who they are. And people love you for who you are, and not how you look.
  10. Know that you’re enough. You are good enough for you! You do not need to prove yourself to anyone. You do not need to impress anyone but yourself. BeYOUtiful.

Happiness is found when you stop comparing yourself to others~

-keep shining

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